My connection to tarotNew!

Tarot and fortune telling is one of those things I have always had an interest in. From having my first palm reading done at 18 to having a psychic medium come to my bachelorette party to give everyone readings 20 years ago, it is something I have always dipped my toes into. When it came to tarot, I was always too overwhelmed to even think about it. How could I possibly memorise all those cards? I wasn’t a psychic medium so what business did I have using cards?

I have been very vocal and open about the treatment I received from the general paranormal field when I first joined. As I wasn’t a psychic medium and was in turn a very honest investigator, I was often told I didn’t belong. One stranger on a tour I attended once asked me why I even bother when I can’t see the things that mediums see. Even today I am confronted by people who tell me that I am not a ‘real paranormal investigator’ because I don’t believe what they believe or do things their way. It is a mindset that unfortunately, extends beyond paranormal investigating. When the discussion turned to tarot, once again I was given the impression it was an area I was not welcome in.

I was just talking to the wrong people!

One of the biggest misconceptions about tarot is the old myth that you should never buy your own deck of cards and that they had to be gifted to you. Funnily enough, the person who used to tell me this knew how much I wanted to get into tarot so why didn’t they just give me a cheap deck of cards to get me started? I could only give some many hints until one day I realised how ridiculous it was and that I was a grown woman, and if I wanted to go buy a tarot deck, well I would go and buy a tarot deck. So I did!

My first deck was the Steampunk Tarot by Barbara Moore. Aside from loving and resonating with the imagery, which was based on the traditional Rider Waite deck, the accompanying booklet was great for a beginner like me. It told me everything I needed to know and acted as a fantastic reference point when I had no idea what I was doing. Not all guides that come with decks are as accomodating but I would soon find that Moore’s guides would help shape the way I read tarot.

Steampunk Tarot by Barbara Moore Photo by Sarah LLIFS

I soon started buying different decks all based on the Rider Waite method and of course purchased a Rider Waite deck as well. This became quite confusing to me because each guide was giving me different meanings, different ways of reading and for someone that needed a bit of guidance, I became stuck and I ended up putting the cards down for several months (I think it may have ended up being well over a year). It was too hard, I wasn’t remembering the cards and the process of doing a reading wasn’t enjoyable because I felt like I didn’t know what I was doing. I am not sure what led to me picking up the cards again. It was most likely seeing a deck that called to me. If you are into tarot, you will know what I am talking about. A deck that just sings to you and tells you that it belongs in your hands. Each picture just makes sense and the visuals resonate with you in a way that you can’t put into words. I once again went back to my Steampunk deck because Barbara Moore just made so much sense. She would give the meanings but really encouraged you to look within for the answers and that the guide was there to be used as a tool and not a crutch.

I decided to get back into it but this time without pressuring myself. I was never going to be doing readings for people, it was always just for me so why was I getting myself all worked up? I needed to trust my intuition and stop with the conflicting guides. In all honesty and hindsight, I wish I had done a tarot course. Many places offer different tarot courses which teach you methods and how to get in tune with yourself, but as a stay-at-home Mum at the time, it wasn’t something I could afford. So I decided to take matters into my own hands. 

I had casually been referring to Biddy Tarot which is one of the most well known sources of tarot education. I purchased a journal. Not just any journal, but a Handbook For the Recently Deceased ruled journal that reflected my love for Beetlejuice. This was the perfect place for me to make my own tarot guide. I started to write in the journal the meaning of the major arcana and minor arcana, what all the suits meant and how to do a reading. Using Biddy Tarot and an original Rider Waite guide as my reference point, I wrote it in my own words and my own interpretation of what they said it all meant. I then purchased a cheap Rider Waite Deck and stuck a copy of each and every card on a double-page spread and wrote the meaning of the card. Again the meaning was based on the official meanings, but with my interpretations included. It took several weeks to do because I would only do a couple of cards at a time. I loved every second of this process and have been thinking about doing it again. It helped me to understand each card and while I don’t remember what I have written for each and every card, I have my own reference handy, written by me and inspired by me. It has helped my own work with tarot so much. I even hope that one day I can hand this down to my kids or my grandkids much like my grandmother’s cards ended up with me.

Tarot is something extremely personal and again, I can’t tell you why I have this connection to it, but I just do. I can’t tell you what I love about it, just that I love it. Sometimes I just like to sit and shuffle cards while other times I like to look at one of the 30 or so decks I own. I don’t tend to read the other decks as they are very niche decks, but I prefer to sit and admire the artwork and read the guidebooks. It took a few years before I got into oracle cards and while I do own a few decks, it is tarot that I am most connected to.

So I guess the message I wanted to get out to you is not to let someone or something hold you back. If you feel a calling to something or if there is something you want to try, don’t let someone tell you can’t. Money can always be a factor, but there is always a way to make it work, it just may take more effort and some creative thinking. A lot of what I do on my blog is finding ways to give people different options depending on physical or financial limitations so that everyone can get involved in the paranormal. Tarot is no different! I still very much remember being told I didn’t belong and I don’t want anyone to feel that way. I still feel like daily but I am still here and doing things my way.

We all belong.

A range of tarot cards are available at the LLIFS Shop for Australian customers. I only sell decks that I would buy myself (mainly because if I don’t sell them I have to keep them, so it has to be something I am happy to have as part of my collection) so it is a very curated collection and insight into my weird and wonderful taste  https://shop.llifs.com.au/

If you are looking for guidance in tarot, I recommend you follow Tarot Queen on Facebook. I have had readings from Renata that have been incredibly helpful, plus she has a very honest way of talking about tarot. Not the fluffy nonsense, but the reality. She is also very encouraging and welcomes anyone with an interest in tarot. There is also an option for further tarot education and guidance at very accessible prices, which are well worth the investment.